So I know I am the worst when it comes to consistency and my blog.. what can I say, there are other things that are more important than blogging, things like kids, hubby, family, school, playing and sleep! I also have to admit that I went on a diet of blogging because every gosh dang time I read someone else's blog (ok not everyone's) I wanted to throw up.
Are people so perfect? Every time I read a blog I feel just that much more insufficient at what I already feel insufficient about anyway. So I decided I didn't need help feeling less than what I am and I went on a blog diet. I wonder if blogger's out there really have such perfect lives, do they ever fight with their spouses, do they ever yell at their kids, is their laundry ever not done. I would beg to differ!
Well needless to say, I got tired of seeing all the perfection and decided that I was not put here on this earth to sit and compare myself to others and their "so-called life".
So in an effort to help people not throw up in their mouths I will try to just share whats going on and maybe some thoughts I have had as of late. That being said, here is a little catch up as to what we have been up to.
School is over for me for the summer, I am loving the break but feel a little lazy at times! The kids are almost done with school and Jake is also finished for the summer.
School for me was a great experience! I am finished with my Associates degree and will be starting my BA this fall either at the U or at UVU, but most likely the U. Yes that means we are probably moving, this has more to do with work and Jake than me, so either way I am fine! We just aren't sure when or where! (I told Jake I was going to be pretty picky about where we lived because I want to be there for a while). I just got my acceptance letter this last week to the U; and was excited when I pulled up my transcripts from UVU to see that I had gotten straight A's and had my 2nd 4.0! If you knew me 12 years ago in High-school you would know what an accomplishment that is for me. I was not one who cared much about grades in those days, and to be honest I did my fair share of cheating. Oops did I say that out loud, I cheated in high-school! However, these days, I do take much more pride in my school work then I did back then. Thank heavens for wisdom and age!
I felt a great sense of accomplishment in learning and doing good on my tests. It's nice to know that I can still put my mind to something and be successful!
So the question I have had for several years and something probably most women can relate to in some way is:
Is it better to be: (more important, more wise, more celestially oriented...)
- stay at home mom
- working mom
- or in my case student mom
- or both
I am the first to admit that I always thought and still do that it's very important to be a mom, and first things first. However I have also learned that it is ok to persue things for yourself. I felt guilty before when I had a thought about going back to school or working, and felt jealous when I saw other women taking on that role. I think that is why there is always that debate between women who work and women who stay home. It's because as mom's we always feel insufficient and there fore put blame or cast doubts on other women who are doing the other thing (grass is always greener on the other side)
I have also learned that we as woman cannot make that decision for each other and it is a very personal decision between Heavenly Father and the individual as to what is best for them. So I am not taking sides, women should support one another and not tear others down for choosing the other.
As I have grown over the years I have come to appreciate those woman who helped me to see that things aren't always meant to be "Perfect". To you I say Thank You!!!
I still struggle with wondering how I can possibly do it all, I feel very insecure when I think about 4 more years of school, being a mom, and wife and everything else in between. However, through this last semester I have felt at peace and I also feel very proud that I am showing my kids how important it really is to go to school and to get a degree. Jake and I always talk about how we want our kids to be successful in life, well I have come to the conclusion that if I don't think it's important to me, why would they think it's important to them?
So, one day at a time I will make it all work and in the end I will be proud of me, Jake will be proud of me (he already is, the wonderful hubby) and hopefully my kids will be proud of me.
So here's to women who follow their dreams, whether it be working, school, or as I call it FHD (family & human development; aka stay at home mom).... hooray and follow your heart!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment